Hajja Salesjana July-September 2022
I was born a restless child and never faltered from my constant busyness into adulthood. The restlessness within was twofold: One, I tended toward generalized anxiety (e.g., fear of everything), and two, I grew up in a household rife with inconstancy and unexpected strife. To their credit, my parents raised my brother and me with rhythm and routine, but my brother’s burgeoning psychological diagnoses during early adolescence hurled the rest of us into a steady stream of uncertainty and panic. Thus the perpetuation of interior strife – rather than a state of unfaltering tranquility – was born in my heart. In early adulthood, I chose to control everything in my environment as a feeble attempt to reclaim that lost fruit of the Holy Spirit; or rather, peace was a spiritual fruit that I rarely experienced and yet desperately longed for. I wrongfully assumed that, by organizing and cleaning, rearranging furniture and leaving no room for spontaneity, my life would finally be serene. But the restlessness did not cease within my heart. Then I became a parent, and God chose motherhood (particularly of daughters with special needs) to pluck me out of that spiritual safety net I had long before woven around my heart. Instead of gradual change, I was thrust into a new life that consisted of never-ending (and often unwelcome) surprises, as well as waves of grief and chaos due to our medically fragile daughters' needs. How, then, was interior peace possible, let alone likely, in the midst of such turmoil and mystery? Blessedly, the Lord has slowly taught me about discovering – and maintaining – that ever-elusive peace for which we all yearn and yet few of us master in this life. I’d like to share these discoveries with you as you keep in mind that I am very much a spiritual novice when it comes to such wisdom. Create a Life of Order Rather Than Chaos Remember, God does not exist in chaos, though the enemy does. Our Heavenly Father created the Earth in six days using a gentle pattern. We must model our own lives after this. It does no good for us to constantly chase distractions and diversions, which are the devil’s playground to foster restlessness within us. Insteadof fillingour liveswithmental and Photo by by Jeremy Brady - www.unsplash.com Three Simple Paths to Interior Peace by Jeannie Ewing (Catholic Exchange) 6 Lulju - Settembru 2022 hajja
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