Hajja Salesjana January February 2017

23 From heartache to joy: A 10-year long journey Last year marked the tenth anniversary of my consecration to God within the Institute of the Volunteers of Don Bosco (VDB). This basically means that I have sought to answer God’s call to be a sign of Jesus’s and Don Bosco’s presence in the world. Taking the vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience, VDBs commit themselves to dedicate all their lives to God, whilst still living in the world. Indeed, most people don’t even know we exist! The following is an excerpt of a prayer I wrote about these last 10 years of commitment to God. Lord, As I look over the past 10 years, I cannot help but experience a vast array of emotions. I am grateful for the incredible transformation you have worked within me. At the same time, I cannot but feel a pang of remorse about all the years I spent running away from you, to a place I thought I would not need you any longer! I cannot help but feel saddened for all those years I experienced you, not as you are, but as an extension of my parents, with their flaws and humanity. At the time, I experienced your call as a heavy burden to bear. So I ran. You, like the father of the young son in the parable, allowed me to betray you. You waited for me whilst I roamed distant lands in search of freedom and autonomy. I sought happiness in friendships and work. I relegated you to a place within me that couldn’t be easily accessed. I became tense, bitter and irritable. I experienced sadness beyond belief. Finally, I was too tired to run any longer. When I turned back to you, dejected and exhausted from the journey, I found you waiting for me – you ran towards me and enveloped me in a huge, comforting hug. You reassured me that I was finally home, as you poured salve onto my wounds and kissed them into healing. Lord, I am so incredibly grateful to you that I cannot help the lump forming in my throat. You held me whilst I was brought face to face with my deepest insecurities and vulnerability – and it was there that I finally recognised you. With loving tenderness, you shone your light into my brokenness. In that dark place, I could finally allow you to love and heal me. I have no words to describe how grateful I am to you, Lord. You brought me back to life. You blessed me with companions who could translate your love into words I could understand. You even showed me that, through calling me to be a Salesian, you wanted to entrust me with some of the poorest people, so I could show them some of your love. How could I ever thank you enough for the gift to be truly and completely yours, to dwell forever in your most perfect and holy love, and share that with your people? How could I ever thank you enough for the gift of Don Bosco, that dreamer who transformed your love in a life spent for the salvation of the young! Lord, I am not worthy to be sitting at your feet and washing them with my tears. Yet, my Lord, you have performed great deeds within me. May the rest of my years truly be a song of praise to you, and a gift to the people! NB: For anybody interested to know more about the VDB vocation, contact can be made with the Hajja Salesjana Editor. A beautiful reflection from a local VDB about her vocation